Becoming a Butterfly

Yesterday, when I went to get my hair done, I met Mohammad my new stylist for the first time.  He had a great smile and a joyful disposition.    Interestingly, he was in booth 316. 

I showed him the pics I brought on my laptop…so he could see what I wanted.  He said it was completely doable.  So we got started.  He worked with the skillful hands of an experienced stylist.  We chatted and shared.  He told me about his kids and wife…and I showed him pictures of my family on my laptop.  We were just 2 people sharing. 

He asked how my husband and I met and I told him at church…so our conversation went there.  He is a Muslim…I had figured he was.   He told me his beliefs and we compared notes.  There were things similar in our beliefs…but things VERY different too.  But we were polite and kept our conversation centered around, “God is so good.”  And how important “faith” is in our lives.

I told him that I was changing my hair to please my husband…and he seemed to appreciate that.    Then he then told me that his wife had divorced him not too long ago.  You could see the sadness in his face.  He said he hadn’t been able to talk about it for a full year afterwards.  Wow…  I asked, how will he meet a new woman…and he said, they don’t date, but meet through relationships.  He lives a very morally strict life.

There was one point in our conversation, where there was some tension…I told him, I didn’t know much about what a Muslim believed…but I knew that I wouldn’t like to wear something to cover up my hair.  It looked like it would be hot, and I like to feel the wind blow through it.  Then I told him that I believed I was ok with whatever he believed, that he should be free to believe whatever he wanted…but not force it on another.  God would never take away someone’s free will. He wants children to love Him because they choose to…not because He forces them to. 

I said, “You wouldn’t try to force me to be a Muslim would you?”  He got quiet…and looked down.  Then he said, “That is hard, because you want to share what you believe.”  But then I said, “But you wouldn’t try and force me to be a Muslim would you?”   He never said…but I asked him, ”don’t you want your children to love you because you are a good father to them…you wouldn’t force them would you?  What joy would there be in that?”

I said all that to say that we can’t force things in our lives.   Relationships, our religious beliefs…or even another’s weight loss.   We are all on our own journey, and we should be able to do it the way we want to.  We were created with rights…like freedom to choose or not to.  It is respectful to leave people alone and not use manipulative tactics to try and get our way….no matter how good what we think we are doing is.  God is that way.   As a Christian, I believe that Jesus submitted himself to God and became a servant…He said, “Not my will, but yours be done.”  Our will is ours and we can give it, or not.  It is our choice.   But no one should ever take that away.  People should also be allowed to blog here about anything they want to.  But, they should not force themselves, their beliefs…or their will on anyone.

Much of my weight issues are centered around people doing this very type of thing to me.  Playing games…manipulative, controlling, prideful people that abused my will.  I hate it and I am incredibly sensitive to it.   I had boyfriends that would cheat on me and then when I caught them, they would somehow play the victim and try to make it out like I was the villain.   Well, believe me…I see through those lies now.  And I do not play into it.   It is unhealthy and hurts people.  It is wrong.

• If you don’t like someone here…guess what? there are plenty of others to play with. 
• If you can’t say something nice…then don’t say anything at all. 
• If a blog offends you…then stop reading it.   
• If someone comes to you and they are offended by you, then keep it between the two of you and not make it the subject of your next blog.  It makes everyone uncomfortable…
• If someone pulls away from you…that is their choice…so leave them alone…and go on with your own life.    Let it go and move on.  
• But never ever tell someone they do not have a choice, or take away their freedom…I believe that is a right we all have been given and we should respect it!

http://www.buddyslim.com/images/userimages/15794/2nug1wvfqr82.jpg

to see a pic of my new do!